Whole Church, whole gospel, whole world

The Church. The called-out ones.

Church is Music to my Ears

One of my most delightful memories is being admitted into the Junior Choir as a 5 year old, simply because I could read.  Our choir director would hand out lemon wedges for us to suck on, "to clear the voice".  Church meant music, singing, gowns, pomp and circumstance.  To this day, the sound of a good choir brings tears to my eyes.  I enjoy visiting our local United Church - the red carpet, beautiful pews, carved wooden railings, large balconies - all of these things stir my memories of a happy childhood.


Church is Childhood Memories

Another church of my childhood, St. James Anglican Church of Lac Beauport, Quebec, was built in 1890.  It was a place that was home to me when I was a child.  It was a place of weddings, of family gatherings, of holiness and the Book of Common Prayer.  It smelled of old wood and furnishings.  Hymn books were donated by my grandparents in memory of my uncle, Ray Matthews, who served and died as a pilot in the RCAF.

Church is a Place of Salvation

As a young wife and mother, I had plenty of questions about God and Eternity and cults and truth.  A friend took me to Erindale Bible Chapel to hear Helen Gillard speak about Christmas.  I peppered her with questions and she led me to the Lord.  That is the one and only time I ever visited Erindale Bible Chapel.  It is a special place for me, for it is where my journey as an exulting Christian began.

Church is Baptism and Discipleship

Emmanuel Baptist Church in Milton, Ontario, was the church where I first saw Christians take their Bibles to church.  They opened them and followed along as the Pastor preached his sermon.  They looked into Scripture during Sunday School class!  It was at Emmanuel that we were challenged and strengthened in our faith.  It was there that we were baptized as believers in the Lord Jesus Christ.

Church is Rules and Regulations

The next church we attended was Velvet Hills Baptist Church in the Waterloo area.  It was at that church that we learned about division, discord among the brethren, toxic leadership, and authoritarian control.  Our daughter was enrolled in the Christian School at the church, and our lives revolved around meetings and activities related to the church.  There was no time for visiting family outside the church, and if we did so, we needed permission.  There was a "standard sheet" to sign, and many rules to follow.  We were in church on Sunday morning for Sunday School, then worship service; Sunday afternoon for choir practice; Sunday evening for another sermon; Tuesday for Prayer Meeting, Thursday for Soul winning, and Saturday morning for bus ministry.  We were slaves, and we loved it!  When the church split, we were devastated, thinking that there was no other valid church in the area.  They were the cream of the crop!  I look back and see that the Lord set us free.  It's not surprising to me that there no longer is a Velvet Hills Baptist Church.

Church is Compassion

Woodside Bible Fellowship in Elmira took us in when we were broken, bleeding, and wounded.  They showed compassion in so many ways, welcoming us to Bible Studies and surprising us with gifts of food and Christmas presents.  We were accepted and loved, even when we were unlovely.  We look back with thankfulness for a time of healing and rest.

Church is Community

We then attended two churches in the community in which we lived and raised our family.  We developed friendships and delighted in serving others with the gifts God has given us.  I'll have more to say about this in another post.

The point is, all of those churches were not the buildings - they were the people God sent into our lives to love us, to point us to Christ, to walk with us on the way, to challenge us and to bless us.  

It's wonderful to know that we are a part of the Body of Christ, that we are joined to other believers in the great communion of saints.  We are called to love God, and love our neighbour.  This starts with the church.

Sermon and Sovereignty

The Sermon on the Mount is one of the most familiar passages in the Bible.  It starts with the Beatitudes - "Blessed are the poor in spirit", etc.  Notice that the blessed ones aren't the rich and powerful, the celebrity or the world leader.  The ones who are blessed are the mourners, the meek, the ones who long after righteousness.  These humble people are pure in heart, and they delight in making peace.  Even when they are persecuted and reviled, they remember to look heavenward, for they know there is a sure reward awaiting.

It struck me this morning that the fifth chapter of Matthew is not a bunch of disconnected admonishments.  Rather, it is all about the Sovereignty of God.  He is the One who chooses His people and ordains their circumstances.  He wants them to walk humbly before Him, letting their light shine to a cursed and shining world, and making a difference.  He wants them to be the salt of the earth.  Salt is used to enhance the taste of food.  Christians are supposed to enhance the lives of others!

Christ came to fulfill the law, and in this passage He makes it clear that the Pharisees' re-interpretation has been wrong.   I imagine Jesus gazing at the Pharisees while He reminds them that they are not quite as holy as they think they are.

God Sees Our Anger

“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are going with him to court, lest your accuser hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you be put in prison. Truly, I say to you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny.  (Matthew 5:21-26 ESV)

The Pharisees were proud that they'd kept the law, but Jesus pointed out their error.  Even anger deserved judgment, and insults deserved the fire of hell.  Jesus was teaching them that it was the internal sins that matter.  The Sovereign God sees the heart, the broken relationships, the pride. He blesses the humble, the meek, the peacemaker, not the arrogant, angry and proud.

God Sees Our Lust

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell. (Matthew 5:27-30 ESV)

 Jesus wants us to know how serious it is to look with lustful intent.  It's another mark of pride to think that you can lust, and nobody knows.  God sees.  He knows.  The Sovereign God provides everything we need for life and godliness.  He is able to provide a spouse for you.  Humbly wait for His timing.

God Sees Our Relationships

“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

God wants us to remain faithful in our marriages.  The Sovereign God has given you a spouse, and you ought to be faithful.  Yet the Sovereign God also sees when there is abuse and immorality, and He compassionately provides an escape for some.

God Sees our Hearts

“Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’ But I say to you, Do not take an oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. And do not take an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.

Do not ever be flippant about the things you say, for God is Omniscient and hears it all.  All of our speech should be made as if we were under oath to tell the truth.  The earth is God's footstool and heaven is His throne.  He is Sovereign over all.  Humble yourself before Him.  Watch your mouth!

God Sees our Desire for Vengeance 

“You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.

The Old Testament was limiting retaliation for a wrong to what was just and fair, but it was never meant to sanction acts of personal retaliation.  Jesus is asking the hearers to surrender all personal rights.

• Do you believe God is Sovereign?
• Is He able to judge fairly?
• Does He provide, as He promised?
• Can He use our losses to further His Kingdom?

Our Sovereign God is a Righteous Judge, with all the resources of the universe, and all the wisdom.  As we humble ourselves and surrender our rights, He can use our circumstances to accomplish His great will.

God wants us to Love our Enemies

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:31-48 ESV)

God is Sovereign over all, and He is kind and good to all, sending rain on the just and the unjust.  I love how Jesus uses the tax collector as an example - I imagine Matthew was sitting there with a wry smile on his face.  Even the hated tax collectors, like Matthew, love their friends.  Jesus wants us to love our enemies, and to be perfect, just like Him.

God is Sovereign.  Look at all the ways we see God's Sovereignty in this passage.

God chooses the elect and ordains their steps.  He knows which ones will be peacemakers, and which will be reviled.  Great will be their reward in Heaven, and God is the One who will give it.

God works in all of our relationships, in marriages and divorces, in strained relationships and legal battles.  He is Sovereign over all relationships, over our friends and our enemies, our workmates and our relatives. 

God is Sovereign over all that happens in our lives - the things that might puff us up, and the things that might trip us.  We must walk humbly before Him all the days of our life.

God is the Sovereign Judge of all the earth.  There is no need to take vengeance on our enemies, for God will set all things right in the end.

Take comfort in His Sovereignty!

Heavenly Father, Your Sovereignty over all is such a comfort to me.  I know that all things work together for good to those who love You, who are called according to Your purpose.  Even tragedies such as death or a battle with debilitating disease, even trials that break our bones or our hearts or our banks… all things are under Your control. 

Nothing is ever a surprise to You.  Your love never fails.  Help us, Lord, to walk humbly before you always.

Serving without Sinking: What happens when we serve in love (and when we don't) | The Good Book Blog

Serving without Sinking: What happens when we serve in love (and when we don't) | The Good Book Blog

Out of Sync

My life has been upside-down this year.

I've been weeding and organizing -weeding out the many superfluous books that I have, and organizing what is left.  Until that task is completed, I'm afraid I will be neglecting my blog.  (Sorry.)

I've also begun a new medication that is designed to help me with the constant pain I endure.  I take it at 9 pm, and it enables me to sleep better than I have in quite some time.  However, now that I am sleeping better, I am not up before the chickens or the Critter.  That has thrown off my groove.

My normal routine has been to go to bed, toss and turn, wake up frequently, and give up sleeping around six o'clock in the morning.  I get up, make coffee, and go to my "Bible Study Desk".  I call that one my "Bible Study Desk" because it is then distinguished from my "Computer Desk" and my "Craft Desk".

Anyway, if I start at my BSD, sipping coffee and reading God's Word, I take notes and usually have something to share with the world.  Hence this blog.

But since I started the new medication, I've been sleeping in.  I get up around 7 or even as late as 8, and Christopher is already up and at it.  This means that he is trying to play a game before his mother gets after him to feed the horses and chickens and dogs and cats, and bring in the wood, and take out the ashes and the compost.  Because he is in the Great Room where my Computer Desk is located, I mosey on out to check on him and to bark orders his way, then  I sit down to quickly check my email.

I don't visit my BSD.

I haven't been reading my Bible much.

As a result, I haven't been blogging.

(Did anyone miss me?)

I do have a plan.  I want to work very  hard at re-organizing the library.  I have given away 30 boxes of books, and will have more to give away at the end of this week.  I have to move a few books and dismantle a shelf in order to open up the cluttered area and make it into an inviting space.  I'll need lots of help from children to do so.

Once the library is clean, I have to start my seedlings.  I'll put them on a shelf in front of the south-facing window, which is perfect for that.

After that is done, I plan on getting back in sync.  I'll set my alarm if I have to, so I can get up before Critter and get back to reading and journalling and writing.

If you are a regular reader of this blog, you'll know that I deal with daily pain.  Moving books and organizing makes the pain worse, but it will be OH SO WORTH IT to have a delightful space for our family library.  I'm keeping all of our favourite books.

Short Term Memory

How soon we forget.

I am one of those people who has a photographic memory, or at least I used to, back in the day.  In the middle of an exam, I could close my eyes and visualize my notebook, or the exact paragraph of the textbook where the answer to the question lay.  Even today, over 40 years since I graduated from high school, I can remember notes to self or phone numbers I've written them down once or twice.

So why is my memory so bad when it comes to relationships?  Why is it so easy to forget the promise I made nearly 40 years ago, to love my husband until death do us part? I do love him - don't get me wrong.  But it's very easy for me to be discontented or frustrated in our marriage, simply because my husband is so different from me.

Barnabas Piper would understand.  He wrote about his frustration with his wife when she critiqued a bit of writing he had done.  When she gave her honest opinion that it should be scrapped, Barnabas became sullen.  He forgot that his wife is his greatest supporter and encouragement.  His memory failed him.

Barnabas wrote,

 Memory isn’t only what happens to come to mind as we turn our thoughts to past events; it is a purposeful act of looking back. It is intentionally recalling the moments that led to this reality.

Purposeful.  Intentional. 

 Memory must be controlled.  

So when I go to bed alone, again, I must remember that my husband loves me, that he considers me his best friend, and that he is not intending to cause me pain when he stays up reading while I go to sleep.  I must remember that he is a night owl and I am a morning lark.

When I do not get an answer to a question I've asked for the sixth or seventh time in a row, I must remember that he is a thinker and he's pondering what to say.  Just because I am quick to respond, doesn't mean he has to be.  God made him a deep thinker, and that is good.

Our Personalities are Different

Rick Thomas wrote about a simple way to figure out what type of person someone is.  The article makes the case that the Bible's assessment of our personalities is not very flattering - we have a problem with the deceitfulness of sin.  This problem does not end when we become Christians, although the Holy Spirit dwelling within works in our lives to sanctify us daily.

Personality is not the Point

The point is this:  We are to die to self, daily.  We are to grow in Christ, daily.  We are to exhibit the Fruit of the Spirit as we love God and love our neighbours, moment by moment, hour by hour, every single day.  The best way to do that is to sharpen our memories, holding fast to what is good and rejecting what is evil.

Sharpen the Memory - Look Back on Life Through Biblical Lenses

This world is broken, but it's also beautiful.  When I look at life I must see the greatness of the Creator as well as the fallenness of mankind.  I must use my transformed memory to look back and see how the Lord has been good, working in our family, showing His power and His great love.

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.(Romans 12:2 ESV)

My husband bought me this beautiful ring, simply because he loves me.  It has 12 tiny diamonds set in the edge (one for each of our dozen children).  The inside of the ring is filled with hearts - 14 of them!  The perfect number to represent the two of us and our large family.

I have made a promise to myself, that every time I look at this ring on my finger, I will remember.

I will remember that

• God brought us together!
• God has blessed our marriage.
• Our relationship matters - to God, to our family, to the world
• My husband loves me.
• I love my husband.
• We are in this together, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health
• We are a reflection of Christ, the Bridegroom, and His Bride, the Church
• We are together until death do us part.

I will remember.

The Blind Could See

The tenth chapter of Mark tells the story of all sorts of capable, intelligent, educated people.  Each of the people of groups that encountered Jesus were quite sure that they were on the right track.  In fact, they were so sure of their own correct viewpoint that they were willing to speak up and challenge Jesus.

They couldn't have been more wrong.

The Pharisees had it all together.  They had spent years and years studying the Law, and thought they knew it all.  They wanted to trick Jesus, so they asked Him a question about divorce.  He set them straight.  They didn't realize, but they were dead wrong.

The disciples had it all together.  They were the ones walking with Jesus every day.  They knew how important He was, and how necessary His ministry. So they kept the little children away.  They thought they were helping their Master in ministry, but they were dead wrong.

The Rich Young Ruler had it all together.  He kept every jot and tittle of the law, and had from his youth.  He thought he could inherit eternal life and keep his earthly wealth, but he was dead wrong.

James and John had it all together.  They were part of Jesus' inner circle, and they just knew that someday they'd have a special place in heaven.  They thought that following their Master meant accolades and honour, but they were dead wrong.

The people of Jericho had it all together.  I imagine there was quite a bit of excitement when Jesus came into town!  Everyone would line up to see Him and to hear Him speak.  He was a celebrity at this point in His ministry, and everywhere He want, great crowds followed.  There was no time to bother with some blind beggar, sitting by the side of the road.  The crowds were dead wrong.

None of Them Could See

The Pharisees could not see that they were trying to trick the Omniscient.
The Disciples could not see that they way to eternal life is to humble yourself, like a little child.
The Rich Young Ruler could not see that his treasures were weighing him down, blinding him to eternal wealth.
James and John did not see the lesson of their Master who was a Servant to all.
The People of Jericho did not see that the person of interest to Jesus that day was a blind and helpless beggar.

Blind Bartimaeus

And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out and say, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!” And many rebuked him, telling him to be silent. But he cried out all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”(Mark 10:47-48 ESV)

Bartimaeus Could See

• Jesus was present
• Jesus was able
• Jesus was merciful
• Jesus was the Son of David

Bartimaeus saw more than any of the others mentioned in this chapter.  He was poor and blind and needy, but rich in faith.  Jesus asked him, "What do you want me to do for you?"

Let Me Recover My Sight

Bartimaeus, the one who could see through eyes of faith alone, wanted to see the world.  Jesus had mercy on him.

And Jesus said to him, “Go your way; your faith has made you well.” And immediately he recovered his sight and followed him on the way.  (Mark 10:52 ESV)

Go Your Way

Jesus told Bartimaeus to go his own way.  The only way Bartimaeus wanted to go was after Jesus.  He followed His Master on the way.

Lessons

1. Things are not always as they seem.  People who have it all together in their own minds, don't necessarily have it all together.  Man looks at the outward appearance.  The Lord looks at the heart.  He considers the humble children and the blind beggars (the poor and needy) to be infinitely valuable. As followers of Christ, we should do the same.
2. Afflictions aren't always terrible.  I'm sure nobody would choose to be blind, to have to sit at the side of the road and beg for enough money to buy a bit of supper.  Yet God, in His infinite wisdom, blessed Bartimaeus with blindness.  He gave him eyes of faith, which are infinitely better than eyes that can see the material world.
3. Even Spiritual Leaders can miss the mark.  The Disciples walked with Jesus every day, yet made some serious errors in judgment.  The Bible warns us to guard against pride - and Christians can stumble and fall just like anyone else.  Be careful, Christian, to guard your heart.  Consider yourself to be a Servant - a doulos - a Slave to the Good Master, our Saviour, Jesus Christ.

Bartimaeus was a Street Preacher

He called out loudly, "Have mercy on me!"  Everyone knew he was yelling.  Everyone saw what happened.  Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry (CARM) has a section on Street Preaching that's worth checking out.  

Put a Knife to Your Throat

When you sit down to eat with a ruler,
observe carefully what is before you,
and put a knife to your throat
if you are given to appetite.
Do not desire his delicacies,
for they are deceptive food.
                      ~Proverbs 23:1-3 ESV

Someone might read these words of wisdom and think, "I'll be careful next time I sit down to eat with a ruler.  Not going to happen any time soon.  It's not like the Queen of England or POTUS will invite me to tea at Buckingham Palace or the White House."

 EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU EAT,

   YOU SIT DOWN WITH A RULER.

You are a slave.  I know it is hard for some people to comprehend, but the Bible is clear in Romans 6: You are either a slave to righteousness, serving Christ, or a slave to sin, serving Satan.  You may not know it.  You may not believe it.  It's true, nonetheless.  Read Matt Slick's article, The Methodology of Satan, to understand more.

So, when you sit down to eat, you sit down with a Ruler.

The question is, which Ruler are you thinking about as you observe what is before you on the table?

Daniel was offered all sorts of delicacies, but he resolved that he would not defile himself with the king's food.  He paid no attention to the King of Babylon.  He was thinking about the King of Kings.

Every time I sit down to eat, I resolve to think about my Ruler.  It is a battle I must wage in my mind.  I've struggled with weight issues all of my life, from the time I was about 14 years old.  A broken leg left me immobile for weeks, and I gained about 30 pounds.  Since then, my weight has been an issue.

A few years ago I lost nearly 50 lbs, and kept most of it off for a couple of years.  It slowly started to pile back on and I was thinking I'd have to do something about it, then I broke three bones in my foot.  Three months later I am sitting here with an extra 30 lbs.  I can blame the broken bones, the wheelchair, the lack of activity... but the truth is, I should have paid attention.   I should have made wiser choices, knowing that this would be a struggle.  I chose to ignore the tighter clothes, the flabby belly - I chose the excuses (It's Christmas!) and refused to face reality.

I chose to ignore the voice of my Saviour.  I wanted to eat those delicacies.

I Chose to Pay NO Attention to His Voice

Listen with undivided attention!

I know I can pay no attention to my King, and succumb to the wiles of the prince of this world, who seeks only to destroy my health and my testimony.  His food is deceptive food - designed to kill.  "Just a little tasty treat," he hisses.  "You can diet tomorrow.  You know it tastes really good.  And after all, God made all things, so this is His gift."   His words are twisted lies.

My Lord Jesus only wants what is best for me.

I am His slave, and He loves me.  He wants me to hear His voice, and He wants to give me life and health and strength to serve my husband and family at home.  He wants me to learn to mortify the flesh and exercise self-control.  He wants me to stop making excuses.

Dear Lord Jesus, Ruler of my Heart,
Teach me to put a knife to my throat in the face of my enemies - lust, appetite, delicacies, driving desires.  You fasted for 40 days and nights in the wilderness.  Teach me how to deny myself.  Help me to resist the devil so that he will flee from me.  Keep my heart and mind turned toward You, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer. I want to keep my eyes on You, to keep my ears tuned to Your voice, to listen to You with my whole heart and with undivided attention.  May it be, dear Lord.  Amen.

SINK

I'm still hopping around the Bible, following a modified version of Professor Horner's Bible Reading System. This morning I read Revelation 4, Ecclesiastes 3, and Psalm 27.

Revelation shows us the glory and beauty of our Lord who sits on a throne of glory, surrounded by redeemed elders, crowned with gold.  Around the throne are four creatures that see all that is revealed.  They are fierce as lions, loyal and steadfast as oxen, rational and made in the image of God like man, and swift as an eagle in flight to obey their God.  They never cease to praise God's holiness and power, for He is worthy.  I read the passage.  I am in awe.

Ecclesiastes reminds me that there is a time for everything, and that I am not in control of what will happen.  I was born; I will die.  I've planted and plucked, I've killed and I've healed.  I have broken down walls and built them up.  I've wept and laughed, and mourned and danced. 

The thing that strikes me about this list is that my God is the One ordaining my steps.  I've lost things - not of my own volition - and prayed that God would help me as I seek them.  I've been silent, and I've spoken up.  I am acutely aware that what happens to me is planned perfectly by my God, who loves me, and who deserves all praise.

There is nothing better for me to do than to rejoice in my work and take pleasure in all of my toil.  I can rest in Him.  I can sink down into Him.   I don't control anything, but I know the One who does.  He is good, and He is right.

Psalm 27 reminds me that the Lord is my light and my salvation.  He is my stronghold in times of trouble, and my guide on the weary path.  He is the One who gives me confidence, and He is absolutely lovely.  I long to be with Him, and I have His promise that I will dwell in the house of the Lord, forever.

I wonder what it will be like, the sea of glass before the throne.  Is it simply figurative, or will I see it?  I long to gaze on the beauty of my Lord, and look upon His goodness.

Trials will come.  Death is inevitable.  I'll experience the pain of false witnesses rising up against me, and the crooked ways of my enemies.  But my God will never forsake me.  I only have to sink into Him, to trust Him, to wait for Him.  When I ponder the message in these passages, I am strong.  My heart takes courage.  I wait for the Lord.

In this season of beginnings, the time of goal-setting and resolutions, many people are changing their habits.  Instead of a list of things they seek to do and to be in this new year, they've been choosing a word that could change their life.  Ann Voskamp chose IN.  Others have chosen words like FAITH, or DELIBERATE, or JOY.  So many different words.  So many different people.

I thought about my one word for 2013. 

It's SINK.  It has to be SINK. 

I considered the word REST, because my heart wants to rest in Jesus, to desist from having to check off my list and from evaluating my walk with God according to my daily accomplishments.  It's too easy for me to feel proud about DOING and despair about NOT DOING.  God loves me, not because of my work, but because He has chosen me to love.  I want to rest in that.

More than that, though, I want to sink into that truth.  I want to be enveloped by God's love as it overwhelms and surrounds me.  I think of Jonah, in the center of God's will as he thought he was drowning, yet God was ordering his steps.  I think of Peter, stepping boldly out of the boat in faith, then losing focus and sinking with fear.  Jesus reached out and caught Peter's hand… He does the same for me. 

I'll write more about my word as I continue to think about what it means to me.  For now, it's my ONE WORD for 2013.   SINK.

Pain, Worry, Discouragement...and Joy?

Okay, did anyone else in the blogosphere have a really bad year?

I burned my finger on the wood stove this evening, and it hurts to type.  Perfect.

Pain

My 2012 started out with pain, as usual.  I broke my arm last December, and the first month of 2012 was spent recuperating.  That was added to the pain in my neck (literally - not my husband, who sometimes can be just that) and my shoulder.  Pain was my constant companion.

February was the month that our grandson had to be taken by ambulance to the hospital.  He was suffering from HSP (Henoch Schonlein Purpura).  I tripped and fell on my sore arm in the middle of February, which gave me SORE MUSCLES for the rest of the month.  One good thing was that my nephew and niece purchased a lovely home.  That was exciting.

Worry

March meant worry over loved ones.  A daughter in an abusive marriage, a husband with heart issues and many "bad heart days".

Helped nephew move in April.  That was fun, but oh, the pain!  The month was a blur of pain with worry mixed in.

May meant a daughter with a bad back, and another daughter who decided to hit the ground with her face.

Discouragement

June was an attempt at a normal life.  I tried to buy and sell vegetables at the market.  Physically could not handle it.  Much more pain.  Discouraged at the fact that I cannot do what I want to do.

In July, my daughter married her first love. (That was the highlight of the year.)  July also brought difficult news from a friend, diagnosed with cancer, and difficult relationships within the family.

More Pain

August - canning.  Canning.  Visiting with friends.  More canning.  Elena started work.

September - more canning.  Marriage Difficulties.

October - broke three bones in left foot.  Humbled ourselves at church, confessing sin. Sick Dog, barfing everywhere.  An online friend lost her firstborn son to a car crash.  This affected me deeply.

November.  Pain from crutches.  Pain from falling three times.  Woe is me.  Pain Clinic with Dr. Miller brought the diagnosis that nothing can be done about my pain.  Sigh.

December.  Gray and Cloudy month.  More bad news.  More hardship.  More pain.

The Good News

I am not going to turn this around to be all sunny and light.  It simply isn't.  Two Thousand Twelve was a difficult year for me, and I for one am glad to see the end of it.

The good news, however, is that the end of the story hasn't been written yet.  As the year draws to its final moments, I know my life will go on.  I know that my every breath is in the Hands of the Lord, and that He is good, and that even if my life on this earth is cut off quickly, glory awaits, and my hope is sure.

I'm thankful for the Bible.  If you read it, you'll know that I am not the only person with faith in God who has struggled.

Moses had a rough journey in the wilderness.  Elijah was isolated and discouraged.  Jonah despaired at the wickedness of the Ninevites, and could not understand why God would forgive such evil.  Jeremiah lost hope.  Naomi suffered grief in the loss of her sons and her husband.  Job was a man of great sorrow, having lost more than I could imagine.  Paul cried out for deliverance from his "thorn in the flesh".

Most of all, Jesus, my Saviour, is a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief.

“We are living in this short time, a time, indeed, full of sadness and sorrow. To live this short time in the spirit of Jesus Christ means to reach out from the midst of our pains and to let them be turned into joy by the love of him who came within our reach." ~Henri J. M. Nouwen

So the good news?  Difficulties do not kill joy.  In fact, I would say that true joy is deeper than pain, stronger than sorrow, more sure than sadness, and more solid than afflictions.  JOY is a gift from Jesus.

Not So Wise

We often hear the story of the wise men from the east who came to Jerusalem, seeking he who had been born King of the Jews.  They had seen an amazing star rise in the sky, and had come to worship the king.

Centuries before, Daniel had been the greatest and wisest in the land.  Perhaps it was his excellent spirit, knowledge and understanding that was passed down through six centuries to the time of this star in the east.  These wise men saw the star.  They traveled many miles over difficult terrain to seek this child, and began asking all over town about the baby who had been born.

When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him; and assembling all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born.

 Herod assembled all the chief priests and scribes of the people.  Like the kings before him, this wicked King wanted all of the facts, and he summoned the best and the wisest of Israel - the chief priests and scribes.  These men knew the Scriptures.  They didn't hesitate when Herod asked him where the Christ was to be born.

They told him, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for so it is written by the prophet:“‘And you, O Bethlehem, in the land of Judah,are by no means least among the rulers of Judah;for from you shall come a rulerwho will shepherd my people Israel.’” Micah 5

The Chief Priests Knew

They knew exactly where the Christ Child was to be born.  They knew He was to be a Ruler, a strong, stern leader.  He was also to be a Shepherd who would tenderly care for His people.

The wise men rejoiced exceedingly with great joy when they saw the star.  They fell down and worshiped the child and gave Him gifts.  Theirs was the proper response to the Son of God.

 The Chief Priests Were Not Wise

Look at the response from the chief priests.  Where were they when the wise men rejoiced?  Where were they when the wise men bowed down, and gave gifts to the Child?

Where were the wise men of the land of Israel?  They were professional scholars whose specialty was explaining the application of the Law.  They knew there was to be a Messiah born.  They knew the wonderful prophecy found in Isaiah:

Isaiah 9:6

For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon1 his shoulder,
and his name shall be called2
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

They knew, and they ignored it.

This begs the question:  What will you do with Jesus? 

The "Holiday Season" is wrapping up for 2012.  You've opened presents and feasted on turkey and gathered with family.  You've celebrated according to your customs.  You've shopped online or at the local mall, and heard songs of the season - Here Comes Santa Claus, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman…

You've also heard

Long time ago in Bethlehem
So the Holy Bible say
Mary's boy child, Jesus Christ
Was born on Christmas day
Hark, now hear the angels sing
A new King born today
And man will live for evermore
Because of Christmas day
Trumpets sound and angels sing
Listen what they say
That Man will live for evermore
Because of Christmas day

Ask yourself, why?  Why was a baby born to a virgin?  Why did the angels appear to the shepherds?  Why did the wise men come from the east to worship this Child?

Wise Men Still Seek Him

Don't be like the Chief Priests.  They knew it all, and did nothing about it.   If you are reading this, I urge you to be wise.  The Bible tells us that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and to depart from evil is understanding.

There is a hell to shun.   To ignore this is not so wise.

Does God Save Everyone?  Click to find the answer.

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